The No Fun League certainly lived up to its name on January 28th. Not only was this one of the worst Super Bowls, it was one of the very worst championship games, of ANY sport, in recent memory.

But give credit to the Baltimore Ravens. Somebody in their organization took the maxim of Keep It Simple, Stupid (KISS) to the cynical extreme. Offensive schemes can be complicated and difficult to learn. The Ravens simply eliminated offense, and focused on special teams and defense--both of which are MUCH easier to coach.

If other teams pick up on this strategy, the reign of the Ravens will be short, since many teams have a pool of greater talent, that could be devoted to a no offense scheme. Still, for this year at least, this virtual perversion of the game of football won the day, if not the ratings.

The biggest money sporting event in the world, and this is as good as it gets?

Let us now consider a current favorite of nearly all the film critics- -Traffic.

Based somewhat on the British miniseries "Traffik," the pic intertwines a number of stories, shifting back and forth between them- -often at exactly the wrong moments. The point of this overlong exercise is that the problem of drug abuse and drug dealing is intractable, given the big money, corruption, and human frailties involved. What keen insight!

By far, the best perfs are turned in by the character actors. Don Cheadle and Luis Guzman lead the way, portraying DEA agents. Not far behind are Benicio Del Toro as a Mexican cop, and Miguel Ferrer as a small-time dealer.

The star talent doesn't fare nearly as well. Michael Douglas is hilariously awful as an Ohio judge picked to be the new Federal drug czar, who finds out that his daughter is a big time addict. Amy Irving, who must hold the all-time Hollywood speed record for going from an ingenue to a hag, plays Douglas' drug addled wife, while his real wife, Catherine Zeta-Jones, has the most ridiculous role in the movie.

Zeta-Jones plays the wife of a major dealer, who supposedly is completely unaware of his occupation. Heck, she's just a suburban San Diego soccer mom. When hubby (Steven Bauer) gets busted, though, she comes into her own, replete with ordering a hit on an informer (twice!) and tough-talking a Mexican drug connection, to whom they owe $3 million.

Incredibly, he forgives the debt after she shows him a doll, made of compressed cocaine, that somehow defies detection at the border crossing. How pressing the powder into a shape, and painting a face on it, magically converts it to a non-identifiable substance is not explained.

What enjoyment there is to be garnered from this film is to figure out exactly which scene is the worst. Any moment involving Douglas would qualify, but his acceptance/rejection speech of the drug czar job is nearly unwatchable. The method used to kill the informant is a howler, as is Bauer's revenge on his shady lawyer. Your eyes will glaze over as you watch real life politicians William Weld, Don Nickles, Harry Reed, Orrin Hatch, Charles Grassley, and Barbara Boxer mug for the cameras with best buddy Douglas.

In short, view this pic at your peril, bearing in mind that it took more than $50 million to get a grainy-looking documentary styled feature, the production values of which could have been achieved with home video.

Could a good movie have been made on this subject? You bet.

Illegal drugs are a bonanza, and not just for the drug lords. Law enforcement and prisons are guaranteed maximum funding, and treatment programs, that seem to function better as networking opportunities for druggies, keep getting supported.

Then there's the whole notion of "legal" drugs. Ever wonder how many car accidents are caused by drivers on ethical drugs or how many "former" drug users have been switched to Percodan? Maybe you just want to know why we humans seem to require chemical additives to get through our day.

Sure enough, a good movie could have been made about drugs, just as a good championship football game could have been played, and just as so MANY aspects of our lives could be better. But, as long as we continue to lower standards, and rationalize all failures, the best we'll get is high-priced mediocrity.